Home Pop Culture Adam Lanza’s body remains unclaimed. But why Peter Lanza?

Adam Lanza’s body remains unclaimed. But why Peter Lanza?

Peter Lanza
Peter Lanza


Peter Lanza
Peter Lanza

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Adam Lanza’s body remains unclaimed. But why Peter Lanza?

Adam Lanza vented for three days whilst his mother Nancy left him all alone. He killed her when she returned.

Adam Lanza wanted to join the military. Nancy Lanza forbid him.

Adam Lanza fought violently with his mother Nancy three days before her death. What caused their fall out?

Adam Lanza’s mother Nancy fought with school.

Adam Lanza said to have worshipped the devil insists former classmate.

Source disputes claim that Adam Lanza was about to be committed. ‘Story should never have run…

Did Adam Lanza’s fear of being imminently ‘committed’ lead him to taking revenge on children who Nancy loved more than him?

Adam Lanza spent hours in windowless basement playing violent video games and fantasizing about guns.

Adam Lanza’s mother Nancy held secret that caused her to worry time was running out.

Adam Lanza victims are now beginning to be buried. Six year old Noah Pozner has funeral.

Adam Lanza shooting leads to idiotic belief that it could have been stopped if only teachers were allowed to carry concealed weapons.

Still no sign of Adam Lanza’s father, Peter Lanza. Media comes looking for him but he is no where to be found.

Adam Lanza’s mother begged his baby sitter to ‘never turn your back.’

Adam Lanza’s mother ‘is not alone’ blogger sparks outrage and reconciliation.

Adam Lanza. Has the media failed in its coverage?

Did Adam Lanza’s mother Nancy cause him to revolt?

Adam Lanza was getting worse. Burning himself with lighter. Nancy Lanza feared losing him.

Adam Lanza. Why did he target Sandy Hook Elementary school?

Adam Lanza’s mother Nancy would encourage him to join her for shooting target practice.

Adam Lanza names of victims released in revenge attack after fight with teachers the day before.

Adam Lanza tried to buy rifle days before but declined background check.

Breaking: Adam Lanza had ‘wild argument’ with four teachers at school a day before.

Adam Lanza was nerd and honors student but very weird. Shunned by the community.

While America gets on the job with grieving and reconciling over the senseless Sandy Hook Elementary school  killings of just one week ago one obvious anomaly still stands. That of the body of Adam Lanza. To date no one has claimed his body. Not his father Peter, not his brother Ryan, not an uncle, a forgiving grandfather, no one.

And yet that in the end may be the ultimate irony in why the tragedy unfolded in the first place. Adam Lanza felt unloved, unwanted, undesired, rejected, humiliated and in essence a waste bin pariah not only at the hands of the community, the schools he attended but also by his very own family who by now it seems fully abandoned him. And it seems they will continue abandoning him even in death.

One wonders even now why Adam Lanza’s immediate family have not publicly addressed their son, their brother’s actions and why for that matter they have yet to claim his body? Do they intend not to ever claim it? Surely they must accept in finality what has happened and on some level their own culpability for what has happened here.

Is it a question of shame, humiliation, fear or just a continuing reluctance to admit that yes Adam Lanza once was part of a family that sadly disintegrated and that even now accepting that reality is even now unbearable.

Really Mr Peter Lanza, what is stopping you even now from claiming your son? Wasn’t his death and that of innocent people enough for you?

As an aside, Adam Lanza’s mother, Nancy’s body was yesterday claimed, it has not been publicly released as to who claimed her body, but a service was performed in the memory of her honor in New Hampshire. One wonders if the prodigal son will ever have his day….



  1. Hey Gingo, careful not to jinx yourself into having a child with special needs yourself! God does not like ugly and the statement you made is extremely ugly. Lets hope and pray you never have a child with a disability or special needs, what a terrible thing to say about someone! You should be ashamed of yourself and hopefully you understand what the word KARMA means.

  2. EXCELLENT REPLY!!! I wholeheartedly agree, I studied much of the school shootings in the past and the one major factor is that almost 90 percent of them all took some type of medication, and people always say “well that is because they were crazy to begin with” but the plain truth is. you dont see them shooting up schools BEFORE they were put on drugs…the pharmaceutical companies do not want the information spread around about the violence some of the medications cause so It is sort of sticken from records so to speak.

  3. as u said his mom loved him and was a constant in his life and thats how he repays her by killing her then killing innocent people!! i bet the dad is glad he wasnt around cause he would probably be dead too!!!

  4. victim? seriously? this dude deliberately set out to kill innocent kids and u are calling him a victim of society!! his family should let him stay there an rot he does not deserve to be treated like a human

  5. should have put him in a asylum. thats where creeps like that belong. Or he could have “abondoned” him in the Amazon

  6. a long time ago they used to put “those that are different” in homes. They were called asylums. THERE WEREN’T MASS SHOOTINGS OF 1ST GRADERS THEN EITHER. You and Adam Lanza can rott in hell

  7. he doesn’t. he wants to blame daddy because his mentally retarded child wasn’t put in the cage he belongs in. only thing the dad is guilty of is not aborting that piece of sh!t. Useless and deserves NO respect in death. I can’t believe anyone think so

  8. You don’t put soldiers in Potter’s field, now do you? They kill hundreds of innocent children every year. Oh wait they’re doing it in the name of freedom so they deserve more respect?

  9. Peter has respectfully claimed his son’s remains and will arrange for a proper burial. The media nor words of complete strangers can ever come close to violating Peter as much as his own conscience will.

  10. As a father he has no reason to feel guilty but the media is stalking his every move and the fact that this article has been released shows to what extent he is going to be violated while he goes through this. Leave this family alone they have enough to deal with.

  11. So right…some parents leave all the work on child with autism to the other parent..it is not easy

  12. Give him the burial he deserves? If he is never claimed and is left out for vultures, it will be more than he deserves. Dang, this site is filled with hand wringing sociopaths.

  13. I believe it’s the judges fault who gave full custody of Adam to the mom. Judges in America typically give the mom full custody, regardless of the father’s desire to be with the child. This is illustrated in the movie “Kramer Versus Kramer” starring Dustin Hoffman. Peter is not the one to blame, people. Adam cut off all ties with his father when he turned 18 years old (considered an adult). You can’t force an adult to spend time with you! Moreover, the parents split when Adam turned 18 years old, meaning that BOTH his parents were present when he was a minor. Most 18 year old adults move out or go off to college. Although Adam refused to see his father, Peter still paid for his education and medical bills. Just because Peter did not see his son when he became an adult, does not mean you can blame Peter; You are just using him as a scapegoat because the murderer is not alive to blame. Besides, Barack Obama grew up with no father and he became the first African American President of the United States; not a murderer. So, give Peter a break, he just loss his ex-wife and his son.

  14. As a father, if Peter was available to Adam emotionally, physically as well as financially, there is absolutely no reason for him to feel guilty now, but 1 out of 3 doesn’t cut it…

  15. is seems like you need to get some “balls” Peter and get your child and lay him to rest. With that $200000.00 in alimony, it seems that money should have been used on your son!!!

  16. Indeed, now it seems as if that is the case, since it’s now been reported Adam’s DNA will be studied and mapped. But I have a couple of questions: First, exactly how is it that word got out that Peter Lanza “failed to claim” his son’s body? No reputable funeral home or coroner’s office will or should release that information to anyone. So clearly, someone is speaking out of line. Second, NONE of us know the tiniest bit about what life was really like in the Lanza family. All anyone can do is use bits and pieces and make up speculation about the rest. So why do any of us feel we have any right to self-righteous anger at anyone in that family, apart from at Adam who actually committed the crime. Thirdly, have any of you had to deal with the media circus surrounding this? It may well be too dangerous for Peter or Ryan Lanza to even go anywhere near where Adam’s body lies right now. All you have to do is read the anger emanating from some of the comments on this article to see that it is not unreasonable for these two men to fear for their own well-being. And we all know that the media is camped out wherever Adams’ body lies, just waiting to sink their teeth into any family member that shows up. Let this family alone, and let Sandy Hook begin to heal.

  17. Peter Lanza..Libor trial James Holmes father ..Aurora shooting..Libor trial make the connection you idiots…For all who are still asleep…sheep to the slaughter

  18. I wouldn’t claim his body either. He was a monster the likes of which the world has rarely seen. Nothing justifies what he did. Like all the school killers, self-centered, making up stories to himself all the time about how wronged he was, how no one appreciated him. Who cares what happens to his body? I would be horrified to go near it, whether or not I was related to him.

  19. Was Adam to Peter, the “successful executive”, a dirty little secret? Perhaps Adam did not “fit” into Peter’s current life nor his corporate world and not many if anyone knew of his son Adam and his mental/social challenges. Besides being very smart, there was nothing about Adam he could boast about. There doesn’t seem to be any admission of Adam’s mental challenges.

    In his statement, Peter who is Adam’s father, is trying to find answers and appears to be as confused if not more confused than the rest of us as to why this tragedy occurred. Ryan indicated that he hadn’t seen his brother since 2010 … strange perhaps for a loving family, but understandable given what we now know. I can’t imagine what life was like in that family for the “normal” child.

    Peter did not mention the last time he saw Adam, I’m sure most assumed he was still an active parent in Adam’s life, given Adam’s challenges. Peter’s statement did not indicate otherwise. Now we know he hadn’t been in Adam’s life for some time so his statement didn’t have much value from a parental perspective.

    Given what has been reported, I can probably provide Peter with some insight as to why his mentally/socially challenged son went on a killing rampage. I’m a complete stranger but unlike Peter, I seem to “get it”.

    To find answers, Peter should simply consult the medical professionals that he together with his dead ex-wife had engaged throughout Adam’s lifetime (before and after the divorce). The same professionals who had diagnosed Adam’s condition(s) and were actively attempting to control/cure him, with the ultimate goal of Adam at least becoming a functioning human being. That would be a starting point, Peter.

    What professionals you ask … exactly.

    Adam did not turn into a monster overnight and ignoring/distancing yourself or failing to acknowledge and address mental illness will not make it go away. Peter, you now have at least one answer.

    Finally, practically the whole world now knows what you may have been trying to keep hidden from so many, for so long, that you had a mentally challenged son, Adam Lanza.

    Merry Christmas…

  20. You are beneath contempt to talk of an incestuous relationship between mother & son. This would have been a woman desperately trying to create a normal life for her son (on her own).

  21. How nice that you gloss over the fact that his mom was a nut ( imagine the trouble a MAN could encounter dealing with such a woman) and also thta when dealing with nutcases–you and others forget to ask the crucial questions, falling to stereotypes of men instead, because thety are easier ( or you are too gay in the biased, literal sense to ask hard questions about mothers, or think outside the gay-flagged box)

    You say “One wonders even now why Adam Lanza’s immediate family have not publicly addressed their son,”

    It is hard for men to intervene when it is so obvious that their is an enmeshed, possibly incestuous relationship with the mother. Our society has not yet included this option as a possibility, and defaults instead to really bad stereotypes about “distant men” or uncaring fathers(which you did).

    so, besides the fact that there are other factors in play ( authorities might have a hold on the body, etc.) you jumped to the sad conclusions your set tends to jump to– it’s the fathers fault; not the mothers fault, who clearly exercised an unusual amount of control over the boy ( incest survivors will tell you that is always the case with an abuser), and who was ultimately his victim ( the burning bed syndrome sure looks good on Lifetime channel–but you can’t imagine that a boy fighting an incestuous mother could do similar horrors), etc.

    Good luck with your biased journalism–you belong in a category with the “Cafe Mom” blog–but please stop associating yourself with factual reporting!

  22. Adam did not have the mental capacity of a 20 year old and Peter should have put more effort into maintaining a relationship with him. Therefore, this can be construed as well said. Besides throwing money his way, Peter did nothing else. Loving someone unconditionally would include claiming their remains and giving them a proper burial. That is what a decent human being would do that loves their child unconditionally. If Nancy were able to do so his remains would have been claimed by now.

  23. Exactly how are you “sure Peter met someone easy-breezy and opted out (coward)”? All indication was that it was Adam who refused contact with his father and brother. Furthermore, interviews with those who interacted with Adam indicated his mother was rather controlling, which would further inhibit his social skills. Did she denigrate the father to the point Adam would not/could not contact him? Very possible, yet I am not going so far as to make a statement that I am “sure”.

  24. How could this be construed as well said in any way? Peter didn’t abandon his son. His son refused contact with _him_ (and his brother, BTW). Adam isolated himself–and yet Peter provided for him, unconditionally. Just like Nancy, Peter loved Adam unconditionally.

  25. He didn’t abandon his son, his son broke contact with him. Easy answers are a dime a dozen, but the real answers are tougher to discover.

  26. This is wrong on so many levels. Peter didn’t abandon his son. Adam refused to have contact with him. Adam may have felt abandoned and isolated, but that doesn’t mean he actually was. His mother was trying to get the help he needed by having him involuntarily committed–this can cause feelings of abandonment, but in actuality, it is done out of love and sympathy.

  27. No one seems to be grasping at the fact that the son and father stopped talking two years ago. Adam was 20 years old at the time he killed himself. Two years ago, at age 18, he was legally able to make the decision whether he wants to continue on with a relationship with his father or not.

    Whose to say the son didnt cut the relationship off with his father and the father is saying to hell with him now?

  28. It appears when Peter divorced Nancy in 2009 he left his troubled son behind for Nancy to deal with. Gave her a good income to compensate, however a troubled Adam needed more than just money.

    Now, its terrible how Peter Lanza abandoned his other son in NJ to take the heat and deal with this tragedy. Coward.

  29. I appreciate scallywag for asking this question. Nobody else seems to wonder what happened to Peter Lanza. Research, however, indicates he lives on the same street in Stamford (Bartina Lane) as a mobster, Dean DePreta, who was recently arrested for tax evasion. Could there be a connection? Maybe not, but it should at least be explored.

  30. Good for you, Scallywag; it has needed to be said.

    I have been simply nauseated by all the people (ostensibly “good” people) who have carried on like the fanatics at a Colonial witch hunt – the ones who’ve screamed about “leaving his body for the vultures.” (Who? Their relatives?) They decry Adam Lanza’s horrific actions – yet the town’s “friendly barber” opined that “he should have cut the boy’s throat when he had the chance.” (And I suppose THAT is a “normal” sentiment?!)

    By many accounts I’ve read, Adam Lanza was taking Fanapt, which is an atypical, antipsychotic, used exclusively for schizophrenia. So, if Adam Lanza was schizophrenic, his responsibility for his actions was diminished. We cannot know to what psychotic depths he had been propelled, but his behavior (terrible as it was) may be more understandable, in light of the devastating nature of this disorder (it can consume 25% of the grey matter of the brain in a childhood schizophrenic.) However, the viciousness and the visceral hatred betrayed by some posters (and certainly, by the barber) are not as readily comprehensible.

    Hopefully, someone in Adam Lanza’s family will actually show some decency, some loyalty, reclaim his body and bury him. Despite the notoriety, he was still a member of their family – one who apparently was clenched in the throes of a horrifying illness.

    Even God can forgive the most awful of sinners; are they (and the critics) better than God? Even if they shut Adam forevermore from their minds and their hearts – he still deserves a decent burial. Otherwise, he will be forever lost, a lonely, wandering child in Eternity; never effectively helped in life, and now scanted by the very people he needed most – his family – in death…

  31. We really don’t know the details of the relationship, or lack thereof, between the son and the father. I find it also telling the the older son Ryan, had no relationship with him either. Perhaps they tried to contact him, to reach out to him, and he refused. Either way, I have sympathy for the murderer, nor the mother. Perhaps we will never know what his thinking was and why he chose to kill those beautiful babies. I think they should take his body and either use it for science or just cremate it. One thing I do know is that the mother should never have had the guns in her home. Owing guns is a responsibility, and one that should not be taken lightly. I am at a loss as to why this woman kept an arsenal in her home. If he didn’t have such easy access, the 26 who were murdered in cold blood would still be alive.

  32. Just how Adam even made it to be 20 years old as if he executed a child for each year he suffered. No wants to admit the greed/evil in the hearts of even the wealthy. Adam was 14 when he Dad left. But it seems he left Nancy with a large settement. Nancy looking to fine a life as her ex-husband remarried in 2011. Peter never looked back and enjoyed his new wife and life. Nancy back from vacation was looking for a school to take Adam. Behind the doors of the Lanza Family was horror only Adam knew. Like Frankenstein as Nancy and Peter produced a child they equally mad into a monster. Ryan was effected but 4 years older then Adam, found his way out and never looked back.

  33. He probably fears for his own life…since I believe the family was framed. He and wife fled their home and have not been heard from….sounds like someone who’s fearful to me.

  34. It sounds to me like the mother and father probably fought over their son and this may have led to the breakup of the marriage. In many cases, one or both spouses tire of the grueling responsibility of caring for a mentally ill person. I’m sure Peter met someone easy- breezy and opted out (coward). Then the rest fell on his the mother, who struggling with MS as well as being a single parent with a troubled child. It also sounds like the brother Ryan wanted nothing to do with the situation (who can blame him). So it was Mom and Adam against the world so to speak. I am sure he did feel abandoned and frustrated. His mother may have complained that if it weren’t for Adam all would be well with her life- people do say mean things when pushed to the brink. I’m just guessing.

  35. Adam’s father should stand up and admit that he abandoned the child when he was eight and caused the tragedy. Why were you not in his life? Give Adam a burial that he deserves. This is the last thing that you could possibly do.

  36. As a result of Peter and Nancy’s divorce, it has been reported that Peter was very generous and willingly went beyond his financial obligations to ensure Nancy never had to work another day of her life.

    Really … given the situation I would suggest “self-serving” as opposed to “generous”.

    Do you think if the tables were turned Peter would have jumped at the chance to be the only constant in Adam’s life 24/7 … hell no!

    Unlike Peter, Nancy loved Adam and unconditionally.

    The fact is Adam’s body remains unclaimed, Nancy is no longer with us and Peter is the next of kin.

    Unlike the past, Peter will not be able to pull out his check book to disassociate himself from this tragic event.

    Divorcing your spouse does not mean divorcing your children, even if you view them as “imperfect”.

    Tragically Nancy is now at peace, adults who loved and were loved by their families are gone and the lives of the parents who loved their children have been altered forever.

    Wherever you are Peter, I hope you can sleep at night.

  37. I don’t blame Peter Lanza for refusing to claim his evil monster son’s body. The state of CT should cremate him and flush his ashes and dump them in a trash heap.

  38. this is really quite sad. Adam could have ended up on a different path had he been given the love and support of the family. Now we have 26 families faced with the lose of a loved one. So much here could have been prevented. Adam’s father should pick up his remains and give him the closure in death that he could not receive in life. Truly one of the most tragic tales I have ever heard about.

  39. Shame isn’t an excuse. If you have done all you can to have helped your mentally ill child (and I think that’s in question), then no matter what your child has done, they are still your child and to reject their body in death is inexcusable.

  40. Perhaps Peter is expecting Nancy to take care of Adam’s burial, she has more than enough money to do so…except Nancy is no longer with us and Peter is the next of kin…hmmmm

  41. this is awful, yet they wonder why he was so messed up, his dad and brother and mother are just as responsible for what happened as Adam… being treated like nothing all your life can mess up your whole mentality.. if they would have been there for him like real parents this may never have happened..

  42. For all we know, they are all curled in a fetal position unable to leave the house.

    Honestly–that would be me.

  43. Yes, I believe it has everything to do with a feeling of shame for the family as to why a body remains unclaimed and the family flees, hiding away.
    The body of Adam Mayes, the man responsible for the Bain kidnapping/murder in Tennessee in May 2012, and who subsequently killed himself when finally caught, went unclaimed by his family in two states until the authorities simply donated the remains to the UT body farm.
    As a species, humanity inflicts untold damage on its own kind, and rarely owns up to it. The story of the Lanza family is no less a story of unspeakable damage than the unspeakable horror the mad boy wrought on the innocents and an almost unbearable anguish to families and a community; indeed, an entire nation filled with families and communities who are stilled in empathetic grief.
    You have asked a fair question on an extremely disturbing and confusing theme. There are no easy answers.

  44. This has really bothered me — enough to look up online to see if anyone else is speaking out about it. The family doesn’t have to support Adam’s actions to claim the body and put it in an unmarked grave (probably the best thing to do).

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