Justin Bieber assaults scumbag paparazzo.

Justin Bieber assaults scumbag paparazzo.

Justin Bieber: 'Shit it's a bixch being a hawt bixch....'

Being a hawt bixch in popular culture for the most part comes with a lot of endless benefits: fame, money, Selena Gomez and a lot of teeny boppers spending money on your hawt ass. It also involves a lot of inconveniences, one of them being that (by definition) they are always in the public eye, which brings us to Sunday afternoon’s spectacle which saw our collective hero Justin Bieber having to physically accost one of his chief benefactors; that of the paparazzi.

tmz: Justin was in Calabasas, where he lives, just after noon Sunday at a mall called The Commons. A paparazzo attempted to take Justin’s picture and, according to law enforcement, some sort of physical altercation erupted between Justin and the camera guy.

The photog called 911, and when cops arrived Justin and GF Selena Gomez had already split.

The photog complained of pain to his upper torso, an ambulance was summoned and he was taken to a local hospital where he was examined and released a short time later.

Kids are you frothing by the torso? I know I am. Justin having to make sense of an adamant paparazzo who wanted a hawt picture of Justin being Justin. Frankly there must be days when Justin wakes up and wonders where all the attention came from and the day he can just idly make out with Selena by the ice cream mall without some giddy photographer slapping a ‘look at me Justin. Look at me- this is for my weekend paycheck.’

But it seems Justin is a tad fed up with this shit and anyway nothing spells rebel than getting out of bed and telling of a paparazzo bent on fame mongering your sweet pout.

At present Justin is wanted by the cops (yes, I am so smitten that by teen heart throb is maturing into a rebel cultural hero) who by now must be irritated as heck because all he wanted was for the scumbag paparazzo who was blocking his driveway to get out of the way. But try telling that to a paparazzo who’s counting dollar signs by the photo click.

Justin Bieber assaults scumbag paparazzo.

Selena to the world: 'Yo waz up- you bixches leave my hawt bixch alone....'

And it gets better:

We’re told several witnesses at the scene say after the altercation, a lawyer walked up to the photog and said he could get a lot of money out of the incident and advised the dude to call for an ambulance and file a police report.

Never mind when Justin finally clears up this minor skirmish he’ll be all that braver and adorable as the world comes to understand that Justin at the end of the day is just the lovable teen heart throb who once in a while wants to step out of his costume and live a normal day to day life without being rudely interrupted by overzealous career opportunists. Not that Justin would know a thing about opportunistic behavior either….

Justin Bieber is a knock out. Literally….

First pictures of Justin Bieber’s love child appear. Do you notice the resemblance?

Mariah Yeater wants to explain to you how she tried conning her ex boyfriend that he was the father of Justin Bieber’s baby too.»

Did my hero Justin Bieber impregnate a 20 year old woman, if so she is liable for statuary rape too.»

Justin Bieber’s new momma friend, Mariah Yeater wants to show you her pierced tongue and kinky tattoos too!»

 

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  • Alex

    “We’re told several witnesses at the scene” I’m very curious as how a one man internet chop shop that masqurades as ‘journalism” by cutting, Pasting & rewritting other medias stories could be accuratly ‘told’ of an incident all the way in California. I’m told that Scallywag is a Martian by a SOURCE- which is probably as accurate as any Scallywag story.