Ah, isn’t it nice to be a celebrity swine that at a moments notice can utter their name and have the masses throttle forward for the mere chance of inhaling their box draws? Which is why Bruce Willis recently decided if he can literally sell his kaka on the sidewalk why not sell his namesake or in his case his scent kaka to all the wonderful people out there wondering how they too can be a demi god like Bruce.
Of course the obvious question one ought to be asking themselves what does Bruce smell like? Bruce the parfum that is. Is it part combination blood stains from a terrorist, bullet shrapnel, Aston Kutcher’s foreskin (or for that matter Bruce’s), Demi Moore’s surf board, Chuck Norris‘ jock straps, Lilo’s crack pipe, Kate Gosselin’s face lift or even the spunk of Bruce’s dog ‘Jack a poo’ that it emitted after casually rubbing against Bruce while Bruce was shaving?
Hmm- Bruce Willis the parfum, isn’t it time you slathered yourself in some today?