The media for some reason or another has been insistent in portraying Gabby Douglas‘ father, Timothy Douglas as a deadbeat dad of sorts and by implication that all black men are also dead beats and not to be trusted, especially when it comes to parenting. The over riding message being that black women have to suffer all by themselves and are forced to use the welfare system to get through (when possible) at great disadvantage and cost to us, the taxpayer.
Adding to this view comes the latest report courtesy of the dailymail (so relentless in their indictment of minorities and other easy targets, ie female school teachers who sleep with 15 year old boys) who presents us with a new piece of information that in their estimation should prove once and for all that Timothy Douglas was indeed the deadbeat dad that they suspect him to be.
dailymail.co.uk: The MailOnline can reveal that Mr Douglas, an Air National Guardsman, was arrested on March 8 of this year for contributing to the delinquency of a child.
It is unclear if Gabby was aware of the shocking allegation, made just days before she wowed the crowd at the AT&T American Cup at Madison Square Garden, but her family struggles have only made her successes more startling.
Little is known about Mr Douglas’ life apart from his estranged wife Natalie Hawkins, and since the documents are sealed, the identity of his alleged victim might be related to a family friend or even a new girlfriend.
A new girlfriend? Are we to believe that Mr Douglas has been ‘at it’ with a new woman? That he can’t just resist the temptation to be a deadbeat dad? Then again at least the dailymail do mention that little is known about Mr Douglas’ life but that of course doesn’t stop the journal from speculating that Timothy Douglas is still up to no good and by inference like most black men is to be wearily regarded. Really?
Let’s have a look at this situation from another point of view:
thyblackman: Perhaps I am wrong on this, but from what I understand, it’s not nearly as difficult to collect child support from members of the United States Airforce as it might be for regular citizens. The parents are easy to find and wages can be garnished. So, the claim that Gabby’s dad “didn’t want to pay child support” might be countered by the possibility that her father (similar to her mom) had financial challenges that made it difficult for him to pay child support every month. If it’s not a crime for Gabby Douglas’s mom to declare bankruptcy (as she did), then it’s not a crime for her father to struggle financially.
Mr Timothy Douglas has since at least 2003 served in the US army forces as an army sergeant (something one should regard with gravity) and has seen many tours. The implication that he was held in contempt for child negligence doesn’t bely the idea that at all times his wages could have easily been garnished by the government (especially when you represent the US government) but for some reason beyond our understanding his wages could not be used to meet his familial obligations.
Then there’s this quote via Gabby Douglas herself via the nypost: “It was really hard for us growing up—my dad had left us, so he wasn’t really in the picture anymore. So my mom had to front all these bills. My dad didn’t really pay the child support. He was short [on money]. It was definitely hard on her part, and she had to take care of me and the rest of my siblings.”
Once again the picture is ripe for us to understand that all black men are losers and a drain on their immediate families and by defacto us, the taxpayer.
But once again thyblackman raises another interesting point of view:
I am not here to say that Timothy Douglas was a model father or perfect citizen. I am here to say that in most failed relationships, there are two parties that both make decisions. The tired narrative of every black man abandoning his kids like an animal in the woods doesn’t apply to most of us, for we are every bit as capable of loving our children as anyone else. Also, every mother who keeps her kids in the household is not an automatic superhero. Some are just as flawed as the men with whom they chose to procreate – that’s why they chose to sleep with these men in the first place.
Perhaps instead of believing what we are told to believe, we should think about things logically. Gabby Douglas is a kid with a biased perspective who (like most of us) knows very little about the inner workings of her parents’ relationship. Gabby Douglas only knows that her dad wasn’t in the household and that her family struggled financially. She probably didn’t see the checks that were coming to her mother to pay living expenses for the home, and she doesn’t know who caused the divorce that ripped her family apart. All Gabby Douglas knows is that it was tough growing up because things didn’t work out with her parents and that the judge gave custody to her mom. That hardly, in any state of the world, proves that Timothy Douglas never loved his child. After all, he did fly 10,000 miles to see her.
So what are we to make of all this in the end? That media prejudice against black men still exists unmitigated (would a white man had received similar damning coverage?), that it’s always easiest to pander to prejudice and outrage? That black men really are low life and negligent rousers who only seek self gratification? That the media is full of low life editors who are all to happy to press buttons to sell papers? Or that life is often quite complex and one can never know what the truth of the situation is until one has to live the drama that these people have had to live. At least one thing is for sure, Gabby Douglas did win 2 gold medals and this she could never have done without hard work, commitment and talent, something that exists within oneself irrespective of who our parents may be.
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Many times there’s nothing more painful than the truth.
I was thinking the same thing. How would a 16-year-old who lived elsewhere know whether a child support check arrived in the mail. Her mother should have told her to stay in a child’s place. She doesn’t know what was going on between her parents. If they seperate doesn’t someone have to leave the home. That’s not abandoment, it’s what happens in every divorced home in the world. The father leaves 99% of the time and the mother keeps the children. Nothing good comes from being a disrespectful, too grown kid. She was winning gold medals until she started disrespecting her father. Nothing good comes from spite. She because a little spite machine for her mother.