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Caroline Cartwritght wants to know if you scream and bellow like her when you have sex.


Having the police turn up to your front door.

Caroline Cartwright has been creating a stir lately in the neighborhood lately where she lives. So much a stir it seems that her appetite for sex may lead her to now spending time behind bars. Welcome to the Caroline likes to scream and fuck all night while you try to get sleep revolving reality show.

True Crime report: Caroline Cartwright says she just can’t help herself. Whenever the 49-year-old woman from England has sex with her husband Steve, she shouts and screams. But she does it so loudly that it sounds to her neighbors as if someone’s being murdered…

Which if you must know reminds this author of one cheery winter where the people living directly above him would use the floorboards for launching pads to sexual nirvana. Never mind the sweat beads that somehow would drip onto my forehead.

Caroline’s woes began with complaints in 2005. Her screaming was so loud that everyone from mailmen to neighbors to mothers walking their kids to school complained to police in Newcastle. The shouts are so loud they drown out television and can be heard well outside her home.

So she was initially slapped with noise abatement orders. But she broke them all. Then she was charged with anti-social behavior. But she broke that cease and desist order three times as well.

One day when my up stair neighbors were coming home I made an attempt while we were all waiting for the lobby elevator to show them the sweat beads that had left a permanent mark on the left side of my face. Of course that yielded very little results as they started groping each other in my presence, her nails digging into his skin, his palms cupping her womanhood and their rising pitter patter breaths colliding in my ear drums.

Finally she was sentenced to eight weeks in the slam, but that sentence was suspended if she behaved for the next year. Now a judge says if she breaks yet another order, she’s headed off to jail for three months.

“It is clear to this court with your noisy love-making and playing loud music you have made your neighbors’ lives thoroughly miserable,” Jeremy Freedman told Cartwright in court. “If you breach this [order] you will be going to prison. This court is giving you one last chance.”

One night I ran into the neighbor across the hallway and jokingly mentioned that my upstairs neighbors were leaving skid marks in my eardrums when he replied that the best thing I could do was go upstairs and kindly explain that their sex life was keeping me deprived of sleep. Eventually one early evening I found the courage after a terrible day at the office and decided enough was enough.

But Cartwright doesn’t quite understand what the fuss is about. To her, screaming like a stabbed animal is normal, and she can’t stop. She also claims it’s a violation of her human rights.

So I headed up and I was about to knock when I overheard them having a heated argument, and thought better of it. That evening I heard nothing, nor the evening after that. It was only when a week later when my neighbor across the hallway mentioned that the couple upstairs split and one of them had moved out. Which makes me wonder if Caroline Cartwright and her husband Steve were to ever split up the town of Newcastle, England might eventually get some peace and quiet again.