Home Scandal and Gossip Great Britain goes to the polls (pubs) to elect a new Prime...

Great Britain goes to the polls (pubs) to elect a new Prime minister.


In case you’re still recovering from showing your papers all day in celebration of Cinco De Mayo, the Mexican St. Patrick’s Day, our erstwhile limey overlords are amidst a very heated and contentious election for Parliament, which is not to be confused with George Clinton’s funk band.

After all, the American knowledge of foreign political systems of government is limited to why we’re number one (disregard health care, education, public transportation, energy efficiency, blah, blah.) Contrary to popular belief, Elton John is not the Queen of England and holds no ceremonial power, except when it comes to song selection at royal dignitaries funerals. And contrary to popular belief, the seating of prime minister (president but with bad teeth and exceptional linguistic capabilities) is not determined by Simon Cowell, but rather by the largest percentage of votes in which the party over which they control.

It has been a thus far energizing three-way race between Conservative David Cameron, the youthful and exuberant Nick Cregg, and the hapless Labourer (not the kind that mows lawns) Gordon Brown.

Realizing they have two years in which to toss around a variety of apocalyptic outcomes following Queen Palin and her mass army of Teabagger’s coup (though they will spelled it “coo”), a bunch of pasty stats nerds are predicting that David Cameron’s Conservatives will come in first but nobody will get a majority of seats. Apparently such an outcome is known to Brits as a hung parliament, meaning they’ll have perennially bulging packages but with no chosen leader for whom will be clearly less known and not nearly as relevant as a fictitious hunky wizard in one of J.K. Rowling’s many fantasy series.

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  • Kerry

    great! Very funny. Loved it.

  • Simon, England

    Brilliant (slow hand claps)

    Simon, England