Monica Coates, San Diego wife killed after estranged husband, Stephen Coates rams truck into home & sets fire. Episode comes weeks after victim filing restraining order against mentally ill ‘paranoid’ husband.
A San Diego woman has died after after her estranged husband, whom she had an order of protection against, rammed his truck into their Bay Park area home, before then setting the residence on fire.
Monica Coates, 61, frantically called 911 just after 7:30 a.m. on Monday to report that her husband, Stephen Coates, 62, had crashed his Toyota Tacoma into the home, NBC San Diego reported.
By the time first responders arrived just minutes later, Coates had allegedly already ignited a fire, causing both the couple to suffer severe burn injuries.
Tragedy comes amid estranged husband paranoia and mental health breakdown
Despite attempts to save the woman, the victim was found unresponsive in the bathroom. Coates who was also found in the bathroom survived the blaze, with severe burns and remains in critical condition.
Coates is expected to be charged with murder when he recovers. The medical examiner’s office is working to determine his wife’s official cause of death.
The tragedy comes just weeks after Monica Coates being granted a restraining order against her ‘paranoid’ spouse on Dec. 1, citing her estranged husband’s ‘erratic’ behavior.
The order was granted after Monica reported that her husband’s mental health had rapidly deteriorated – leading him to believe she was conspiring with others to kill him.
She briefly fled the home after he allegedly started asking friends if he should arm himself with a shotgun, court records show.
San Diego wife had remained hopeful
When she eventually returned, Monica reported finding the home was ‘booby trapped’ with fishing line, and the front door mailing slot had been bolted with a metal plate.
Coates was eventually removed from the home and was admitted to a psychiatric hospital.
It wasn’t immediately clear when he was released.
The husband had moved out of the home a month earlier after apparently suffering mental health issues.
Bang Duong, a neighbor recalled Monica saying, she did not ‘know what was happening with him.’
Adding, ‘So we’re, you know, we were just hoping, praying that, you know, it’d get all better.’
Read a GoFundme fundraiser, ‘We are raising funds to support Nick (25) and his brother Neil (27), following the sudden and tragic loss of their mother, Monica Coates.’
As of late December 31, 2025 the fundraiser had raised $28,215.
