Kids welcome back to the public spectacle called “Lindsay Lohan‘s scary ride to hell and back and my eight ball.’
Today’s episode found our collective hero racing against the clock to make it to her morning court appearance in LA . Apparently she was suppose to be there 8.30 am LA time but somehow managed to haul her ass circa 9.18 am LA time where she turned up dressed like a white virgin.
The fracas ensued after girlfriend cancelled her Saturday night flight out of NYC and opted to see a concert (code word for party favors) instead and to opt to take a Sunday flight out to LA. Except the Sunday flight never happened on account of Lilo getting the jitters about her flight after the captain announced their flight was delayed and leaking gas. Which was a code word for Lilo to get off that plane quick smart cause bixch always knows a mechanical failure when she sniffs one.
From there it was an episode of spending the evening in the airport lounge wishing for someone to send her a private jet to LA. Of course this being Lilo and not me and you her highness naturally secured the service of Mr Pink Energy Drink who hauled her ass into LA this morning. Of course like me you will now remember to forever guzzle Mr Pink as if your life depended on it. See Lilo’s plug for her savior.
Returning back to the present our collective hero is expected to plead not guilty to being a liar after she crashed her Porshe last June on the Pacific Coast Highway.
Tells tmz, if her ass is convicted (cause she knows she’s innocent and knows better than to take a plea deal) her probation could be revoked and could see her glittery ass serving 60-90 days in the slammer which would be real upsetting to all us tabloid types.
Other knick knack news has it that daddy Michael Lohan is already in the courthouse (cause dad knows how to milk publicity when it comes time) and some dude throwing what looked like glitter at our combustible honey engine as she nonchalantly strutted for her stage performance in court with mercenary lawyer Mark Heller by her side.
Which is all another way of saying why bother staring in a Hollywood made to shock horror movie when you can simply live one out in public and be sure the camera boys will be there following your every movement whilst sniffing in the shiny glitter that eventually falls back to earth…,
Here are two videos of Lilo arriving in court like the goddess that she is, take note of the police officer crashing to earth as he makes to get an eye full of Madame Eightball herself.
top image found here