Home Scandal and Gossip Found: Loose crocodile in NYC.

Found: Loose crocodile in NYC.


Found: A crocodile in Queens. Anyone missing their cuddly little pet and friend? The little guy, measuring just over two feet, was spotted under a Datsun on Newton Avenue and 29th St. in Astoria.

NY Daily News: “Before you ask, no cops could confirm it came out of the sewer,” said police spokesman James Duffy, referring to an urban legend that such reptiles live in the city’s sewer system.

We hope that someone comes forward soon and claims the little guy, because we’d hate for the urban legend to be true that ravenous reptiles troll the underground sewer systems of New York City; the rats in the subway stations are frightening enough creatures lurking in the underground cesspools of the city.

NY Daily News: “The poor little thing looked dazed and confused,” said Manhattan novelist Joyce Hackett, who took photos with her iPhone.

Ms. Hackett continued, “Hopefully, the thing will get its own reality show,” and we love her for that astute, and timely observation of our current pathetic media whore culture. We hope so too, Ms. Hackett, we hope so too.

It’s still in question, however, whether or not the reptile is an alligator or a crocodile; as pictures of the creature suggest by its U-shaped snout, that it may, indeed, be the former because crocodiles have V-Shaped snouts.

Emergency Service Unit cops used a pool and a noose to capture the reptile, and then wrapped its mouth with electrical tape and hauled him off to jail. City Animal Care and Control officers took possession of the croc, or gator, and plan to send it to a wildlife sanctuary.

Ah, life in the concrete jungle. Never a dull second.

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