Things were wondering when you’re finally going to start twittering about yourself. Don’t stop until you get enough….
In a world increasingly suffocating in ennui and useless information and people viciously banging their pots and pans because that’s how you become rich and famous and your very own realty beauty TV show (ask Kate Gosselin) we’ve decided to wonder out aloud the day you start twittering the following. In a world where civilities and decorum are increasingly of the past we thought we thought we’d help you break those rules in your very own attempt to get your soon to be own reality show too.
Without further ado – let the twittering begin:
1/ The secret place where you like to store all your oxycotins and other illicit products.
2/ What pet name your lover calls you after s/he orgasm.
3/ The little pet name you call your lover after you orgsasm.
4/ Whether it’s a diarrhea day or not?
5/ Where you placed your latest toe nail clippings.
6/ That you decided to give up smoking but you’re having your last one anyway. Please stop dragging us into your psychotic mess…
7/ That you are in a taxi cab and you’re wondering whether you should have chicken or beef for dinner in 9 hours. Please leave us alone.
8/ That you’re about to do your first line of the day.
9/ That the newspapers didn’t have anything to say about you today and you’re bummed.
10/ That you just had a fake death, let alone a fake existence.