“No, I don’t”, I replied. And really, I don’t. I didn’t mention that he was only the third person under 5’9″ that I’d ever decided to tap in my life. “Do you have a type? I throw the question back at you.”
“Well, I don’t want anyone shorter than me”, he said. And I agreed. I didn’t want anyone shorter than him either. He was just tall enough for me to feel like I was not really fucking a Smurf.
“How big is that thing?”, he asked
“I don’t know”, I said. And I really don’t. I have never measured myself, because I don’t care. It’s not going in my ass. Although I can do that.
Don’t ask.
Eventually, I got to the point, being the heauxfessional that I am.
“I have noticed that you are wearing a jock strap”.
“Take pictures of me”, he asked. I am no Annie Liebovitz, but for pictures of this kind, perfection is not necessary. Not that she is anywhere close to perfection, but I digress.
Click click click, I went. Ass models love to put their trunk up in the air. Simon was no different.
“Ready for round one?”, I said, finally getting antsy to fuck him. Sometimes, I’m like that. And this prolonged foreplay was making me antsy.
“What do you mean?”, he said.
Again, I was asked myself if there was a language barrier here, despite the fact he lived in San Francisco for a year, and spoke better English than most Americans. I meant, that we were going to fuck more than one time! That’s what I meant.
“I may need to be worked up to fit all that”, he said looking at my penis. “It’s big.”
“Oh, it’s not that big.”, I said.
Yes, it is. Who am I kidding?
But what the hell am I supposed to say when people say that about it? If I agree, they may not wanna fuck. And I am here to fuck. And if I have to ease him into easing onto it, then so be it. But one way or another, he is sitting on it because I came a long way for this.
Not that I need to coax him much. With poppers, anything is possible. Simon was no different and after a few stalled attempts, he was in and wild. I had my doubts initially, because his grunts bordered on pain.
“Am I hurting you?”, I asked, concerned he’d never sit again.
“Yes. Hurt me some more”, he said.
Simon says.
ewwwwwwwwww………..ugly…….and borderline retarded looking…. a winning combination in any book……….ha!
Goddamit, when is Heaux Confessionals being published?! It’s been long enough!
OMG hahahaha
The heaux is at it again!
OMG, the trickery and fuckery just keeps on a-comin’!