Home Scandal and Gossip How to survive NYC with no money.

How to survive NYC with no money.

SHARE

Solving life’s greatest dilemmas.

Living in NYC is by most accounts one of the most exuberant experiences any one human being can have, having said that you will pretty soon notice living here costs a pretty penny. On the basis of an article that came out of HUffpo today,living in NYC for a day, this author decided to go one better and show you how to live in NYC for a whole year with no money. Think I’m kidding, you haven’t lived this author’s life…

1/ One of the greatest dilemmas of NYC – is the cost of housing. One way or another it’s something you’re going to have to pony up for- unless that is you don’t mind squatting and going back and forth to the housing courts. This author was fortunate/unfortunate enough to find himself living in a house we’re the owner defaulted on the mortgage, left the bank holding the bad news, who then sold the bad news to another bank who had no idea of the extent of the bad news while we all lived like Hemingway and Fitzgerald save without electricity or gas, because by now that too had been turned off- but let’s say the winter of 2007 was a doozy. Just remember NY housing courts are always on your side…

2/ Eat free. Eating requires ponying money or does it? One way to avoid the pitfall of having to pay for food is to make sure you’re always getting yourself invited to events and people’s houses where there is bound to be food and frivolities abound. Of course this pretty much limits you to dinners, so for breakfast we advise walking by deli’s and slowly breathing in the fumes as the stoves cook their first breakfast batches.

3/ Clothes. Never buy your clothes, always have someone give them to you and of course if you’re a regular household name you should have no problem getting designers to lend you items. After all NY is full of designers who’d be happy to have you wear their clothes, all you have to do is ask.

4/ Entertainment; Never pay to go to a party, concert or anything and even get yourself invited to the best parties. How you wonder? Become a blogger. You will be surprised once you start blogging how much you will be solicited by people you never heard of to come by their charity, party, boite, restaurant all because of the belief that somehow people listen to what you have to say about these people.

5/ Public forums believe it or not are also a great tool. Libraries offer free internet and books (okay so you can only use the internet for an hour at a time), parks – wonderful places to congregate, meditate, go running in, hotel lobbies are also a great place to come across people of affluence who will never get tired of buying you a drink assuming you are charming company or tacitly promise there are sexual favors on the way. In our case  we just stick to the charm.

Assuming you have plenty of charm, love of  adventure, a modicum of personality and a vivid interpretation of life you will be fine, if not – there’s always a job for you to be had.

SHARE
Like Scallywagvagabond on Facebook    

Comments are closed.