Kids, to the left is the before I found out I was going to be a fashion victim(literally) model picture of Ali Lohan (doe eyed sister to major media whore and Hollywood vermin vixen Lindsay Lohan) and to the right is the picture of her 19 minutes 3 weeks after she found out that she was destined to have a career as a fashion model.
Seems kind of sad that our collective heroine has gone the extra mile to live up to some idea of what beauty constitutes and what she is resigned to do, which is stop eating for the rest of her life and stuff her mouth with laxatives to make sure she retains her hideous svelte figure. But this of course is the fashion world where literally sabotaging your existence to confirm to appropriate “industry” standards will ensure one’s razor sharp pretty face struts the covers of fashion ennui.
Personally, fashion world hypocrisy aside I’m tempted to go and look for a few quarters in the hope that Ali will take the money and buy herself a twinkie bar (at least 300 calories right?) and a can of chery cola (all that sugar ought to convert to fat) to swish all those calories to the backside of her mouth, and hopefully against hope swallow everything so she can once again look like a human being.
Isn’t it time you sell yourself to an ideal, a fashionable ideal that is…?