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Curtis Eidam arrested: ‘I am wearing a chastity belt locked to my penis’

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Curtis Eidam
Pictured, Curtis Eidam via bookings.
Curtis Eidam
Pictured, Curtis Eidam via bookings.

Curtis Eidam chastity belt. How one Tennessee man came to give arresting officers a very rude shock during a recent DUI transgression. 

Making their entry into the tabloid sweepstakes is the interesting personae of Oak Ridge, Tennessee man Curtis Eidam, 35 who recently caused quite the spectacle during a DUI arrest.

Shall we?

Curtis Eidam’s fun adventures according to a thesmokingun came while he and a female passenger drove through a DUI checkpoint along Knoxville, last month.

After flagging the errant driver down who cops noted in their arrest report reeking of alcohol (never mind), they forced the man through a battery of sobriety tests before our collective hero eventually relented, admitting he had drunk fives shots before driving.

Having clocked a .117 blood alcohol limit and on the way to the slammer, Eidam had to stop to ask the arresting officers to grant him a very special favor.

What favor you wonder?

Unbeknownst to the arresting officers and presumably sweet baby Jesus who was looking on from Pluto or Neptune, Curtis had a secret that he’d been keeping.

Asked why he needed cops to take him back to his car, it’s then Curtis Eidam told shocked officers that he needed to get a hold of keys to unlock the chastity belt attached to his penis.

Cause who after all doesn’t wear chastity belts these days?

What woman doesn’t like a faithful man waiting for her when she gets home? Secure in the knowledge that her man has had his manhood pegged and locked away waiting for her permission to exist…

Asked to explain which key he needed, our collective hero pointed to the key sitting on the necklace of his female passenger.

Kids tell me the whole world isn’t this kinky on the weekends?

From there, a second cop retrieved the keys from 44 year old Rebeka Alexander, who according to the arrest report was also highly intoxicated (oh well) but remained uncharged.

It wasn’t until Eidam made it to the local jail that the arresting officer handed the keys to a jail warden explaining that the new prisoner would probably be needing those any minute now.

Of note, a subsequent police report didn’t elaborate on the background of the chastity belt or Eidams relationship with Alexander or for that matter, the interesting hose mesh he was observed wearing at the time of his arrest, described as ‘some kind of red mesh see-through hose’ along with a ribbon tied in his goatee.

Yes some things are best kept silent.

The arresting report went on to note that our collective hero being charged with DUI,  along with possession of a handgun while under the influence.

Interestingly the report failed to acknowledge whether Curtis Eidam ever managed to unlock his very special chastity belt. Can you guess why?

Man confesses his wife forces him to wear chastity belt when she goes away on business trips.

Curtis Eidam
Why decline?

Curtis Eidam

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