Miley Cyrus took to effortlessly lighting a joint at this evening’s MTV Europe Music awards the way a fish takes to sucking in and sucking out water as it descends deeper into the darkness of the ocean.
Such was the visage of our collective heroine, Miley Cyrus who once again showed she has balls of steel and a desperate need to shock and offend till kingdom come. That said what might be more shocking is the day the pop singer takes to packing her shock routine in her handbag.
The joint incident came to pass after our highness (let’s admit it) went on to congratulate those who came to support her after winning the Best Video gong for “Wrecking Ball.”
Knowing full well that the cameras were desperately poised on her and that tabloid land was ever ginger to send in any perceived indiscretion to the stratosphere (which at Miley’s level translates to instant dollars) the singer nonchalantly took out a joint out of her handbag and told the following:
“I couldn’t fit this award in my bag, but I did find this.”
This being your balls crushed in her fist. This being your eyeballs permanently zapped in her derriere. This being her tongue and tonsils spinning dizzily out of her mouth and into yours. This being the extra added breath of perpetual incorrigible behavior. This being the fxck you I am bigger, better, bolder and brassier than you will ever be and this being you sitting there clapping your life away as Miley Cyrus twerks herself to pop culture revelation…
If only you could fit into Miley Cyrus’ made to order handbag too….