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Video: Tan Mom wants to show you how to party like a (drunk) rock star.

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Tan mom is a preferred hawt bixch too.
Tan mom is a preferred hawt bixch too.

Tan Mom is the tanned hawt bixch you wish you were…

Tan mom knows how to party like a rock star…

What to say, what to think? Looks like Tan Mom, Patricia Krentcil (otherwise known for her relentless adherence to tanning 24/7 and for pushing her lifestyle choices on her 6 year old daughter) may have outdone herself (you surprised bixch?) when she hit Manhattan nightclub XL on Wednesday night.

Reflects Rich Krentcil, her husband, who at this moment is furiously looking for a brown paper bag to wrap over his head:

“Maybe she overdid it. But she doesn’t go out much,”

“It was a little wild, a little crazy. She feels a little bad,”

But of course when tan mom does go out she’s hardly about to let that shit reign in. After all what’s good for a rock star is good for her too…

Added Rich: “She got a little nervous, but she was just trying to have a good time.”

It’s true kids when I get nervous I also look for the nearest bottle service tray and shove my head in it and hope to God that all that free booze trickles down the good nectar I am entitled to for being a hawt bixch.

Reflected night club host Bianca del Rio who must be also looking for her own designer brown paper bag to carefully wrap around her head:

“When I saw her spill her free wine, I knew it was over.”

Is that like saying it’s over when you bring a deprived liquor connoisseur to a local tasting and momentarily turn your head as they taste test the good shit on display?

“I kinda figured it might happen, so we came up with a code word. It was ‘Christmas,’ ” del Rio said.

“After about five minutes, we were just about screaming ‘Christmas!’ and security took her out.”

Never mind, at least tan mom turned up sporting a healthy tan, not that she wont need her own brown paper bag to hide in as well…

'That's right! It's my party and I'll get loaded if I want to!'
'Just one more drink bixches!'

 

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