Kids, it’s time to meet the one eyed raccoon with rabies who is currently roaming the streets of NYC in search of love. One can assume if you are sufficiently polite this hawt bixch will casually smell you up, sniff around your ankles and ever so delicately while it’s sizing you up with its one remaining eye take a giant stab of your ankle where thousands and milllions of rabbies will be transported from its soul onto yours.
According to officials, the one eyed raccoon is believed to have met with an unfortunate event that left it severed of one eye. The little hawt bixch was first discovered by blogger Bobby Finger trying to dizzily scale a fence.
Twitted Bobby: ‘Oh my god a rabid one eyed raccoon.’
And thus the saga of life continues. Missing children, haggard prostitutes, pesticide in your good shit, and the one eyed raccoon with rabies trying to make sense of its very sorry existence…