Seekingarrangement: 63 year old sugar daddy explains all men pay for sex one way or another.

Seekingarrangement: 63 year old sugar daddy explains all men pay for sex one way or another.

Tommy and Monte

All men pay for sex one way or another…

Hmm, here’s an article that might make some of you women out there wonder ‘Am I a form of prostitute even if I know I am not a prostitute or is that just misogynist’s view of women?’  

According to one man, ‘Tommy,‘ a self confessed sugar daddy and his protege, ‘Monte’ whom he met on website seekingarrangement.com two years ago their relationship has been to date a mutually exclusive beneficial one. He pays for those expenses that she is not in the position to absorb on her own (college tuition, designer clothes, Caribbean holidays and now new breasts) and she in return provides Tommy her company and of course sexual favors. Unlike most direct paid for sex deals, theirs is based on friendship and a kind of unspoken understanding as to the dynamics of their arrangement. Something that they tacitly disclose whilst being interviewed by ABC who have decided to explore what all the fuss about the sugar daddy arrangements that make the bulk of seekingarrangement a dating website so popular amongst certain folk.

What’s also interesting about Tommy is that he has the same type of understanding with not just Monte but six other women whom like Monte like to refer to Tommy as his ahem, ‘companion.’

Monte for her part is hardly perturbed by the other girls Tommy likes to spend company with and understands that’s the nature of the type of men that she is attracted to.

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And how exactly does Tommy perceive Monte and the other girls that he courts?

In the interview with ABC, Tommy reflects that walking into a room with someone like Monte who cuts a lithe and sleek appearance is like pulling up in a really nice car. A view that Monte may or may not appreciate.

Explained Tommy:

‘There are sugar babies on different levels,’ he explained. ‘You know, you’ve got your Walmart sugar babies and you’ve got your Neiman Marcus sugar babies and it’s which ones you want to shop at.’

Aside from the nice financial perks, Monte muses there are other advantages to be had being one of Tommy’s paid muses:

‘[He] taught me how to golf, cook, be a classy woman,’ she explained. ‘He’s just transformed me back to something I’ve always wanted to become.’

Seekingarrangement: 63 year old sugar daddy explains all men pay for sex one way or another.

But here is where things get a little tricky and where a bit of mind connivery is in fine order:

Though Tommy admitted that without the promise of sex, he wouldn’t invite Monte to spend time with him or give her any money, both Tommy and Monte insist their relationship is not facilitated on prostitution.

‘It is what it is,’ responded Monte. ‘We all mature and I know I’m gonna be old one day and I hope I get lovin’ too.’

Tommy on the other hand took another stance: ‘If we’re talking about money exchanged for sex, I don’t see that this way. It’s just not “wham, bam, thank you, ma’am.”

Which is to say Tommy is aware he’s only getting Monte’s time and sexual reciprocity because he offers her cash but in his mind he doesn’t like to cling too much to that idea because perhaps he is under the desirous opinion that Monte genuinely likes Tommy, which she may well do. Of course whether Monte would provide sexual favors without the implied promise of money from Tommy is debatable. Nonetheless Tommy ultimately sums up the whole exercise of dating as whether a man is courting her or paying her or has some sort of beneficial arrangement in place ultimately a man will find himself paying to get the attention of a woman one way or another. Which might well be true but that does pose a question in this author’s mind is that because women have come to the conclusion that they are sexual objects to be acquired by the highest bidder or are women just cunning and ruthless and understand that in the cycle of nature and the shorter time she has to revel in her youth and have offspring she must use firm discretion as to navigating the waters of many male suitors who are not necessarily held captive by the same challenges she is.

Offered Monte, one of the drawbacks of having everything taken care of is that Tommy isn’t always there emotionally and that she sometimes feels very lonely. Then again that might be exactly what Tommy desired by assuming  a point of view that a women can really ever be known or loved by putting money into the equation, but even then money can’t solve things of the human heart, unless one of course doesn’t mind being lonely and at arm’s length emotionally. Then again not to throw all women in the same boat as Monte, there are of course many of you women out there who do value intimacy and are more than willing to pay their share of their way which could also suggest many women do not necessarily perceive themselves as sex objects to be acquired even if many men like Tommy may ultimately have that view.

article via abcnews

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  • Annajones13

    You are a terrible writer. I was interested in what you had to say, but it was really hard to get through your article. I had to read every sentence at least twice to understand what you were getting at. If you want to be a blogger, which is in effect a professional writer, you should maybe take an online grammar class to learn about run-on sentences, subject-verb agreement, etc. You may just write me off as a nerdy, grammar freak, but grammar really does serve a purpose – it helps you communicate in a way that is easily understood by your readers. If you want to expand your readership, don’t make us work so hard.

  • scallywag

    Annajones, I may be a ‘terrible writer’ as you have termed me but at the very least I have been willing to explore themes that most journals don’t dare to explore for risking to upstage the manicured apple cart, something that ‘good writers’ are suppose to do. Hopefully you will approve of the grammatical syntax of my rebuke. Or maybe not?

    So back to the question? Can women be bought? Have we become a culture devoid of emotional intimacy and vulnerability that has equated the sexes as bargains to be acquired?