Home Scandal and Gossip My hero Brooke Mueller is arrested for being a coke head and...

My hero Brooke Mueller is arrested for being a coke head and starting a brawl.

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Oh no what did my little ray of sunshine go ahead and do now?

Just when we were all getting used to not reading that our collective ray of hope and discarded trash bag and sometimes punching bag of former husband Charlie Sheen was walking around the boulevard with a used crack pipe or licked inside out cokey bags comes the horrible tale that Brooke Mueller has relapsed back into oblivion.

tmz: Brooke Mueller was arrested last night in Aspen, Colorado on suspicion of felony cocaine possession … TMZ has learned.

According to the Aspen PD, police found Charlie Sheen’s ex-wife inside a nightclub called Escobar after she allegedly assaulted some woman at a nearby drinking establishment.

In addition to cocaine possession, Brooke was also booked on a misdemeanor 3rd degree assault charge. She was released from the Pitkin County jail this morning on $11,000 bond.

Kids I have to be honest, the tears of misery are sliding so fast off my face that tonight me and the chipmunks, Fyodor and Mazeltov will take to looking deeply into each other’s eyes and then falling into a deep embracing hug so as to praise the lord that at least we have been spared the inner torment and self hate that molests  our ray of Sunshine. If only Charlie her crack head husband was there with her in her time of need Brooke would be here with us singing kumbaya.

Such is the life of a tormented ray of hope who refuses to come clean with herself.

Suck it up bixch…

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