The sun always smiles over Lindsay Lohan’s crack pipe!
Kids, me and the chipmunks have broken last year’s crate of cheap champagne and begun in the rejoicing of our collective hero’s immediate release from a hard labor served jail time of a very long 4 and half hours. Hear ye hear ye- the corks are flying all over the dungeon! No more seconds for you young man (watch the chipmunks violently whimper in the background alas…they were so looking forward to getting loaded Monday morning…)
Checking in at the LA county jail system last night at 8.50pm to serve her 30 day punishment for contempt of her probation our hero was
predictably miraculously released at 1.40 am this morning, cause them jails are way overcrowded (well that’s what that officer’s fxcked up expression in the photo above said).
Of course this is the type of justice all you munchkins should be expecting if you happen to be a celebrity miscreant in and out of the legal system (this is the 5th time our media whore has licked the paint off the LA county jail system, air kissed her jail buddy hos hello and goodbye again, which means the 6th time might get our collective heroine 7 and a quarter hours and a group hug from the warden).
Just in case you think the world is stacked against you mere mortals Justice Sautner did impose some fucked up
easy harsh stipulation that Lilo will having to going forward serve out all her community service at the county morgue (which is like asking Lilo to eat choc chip fat free ice cream for eternity) or risk serving an extra 270 days in the slammer.
Final score tally: Lindsay Lohan: 478 999 999 World Citizen who follows law: minus 78 trillion.
Don’t you wish you could make it as a celebrity miscreant too? Of course you do…