Kids, it’s time to gawk at the latest hawt bixch that The Insider is letting on that our collective ‘I’m not in love with Marc anymore dilemma’ whore JLo may or may not be hitting. One good luck at this bixch and I’m praying that she’s not grinding him into oblivion cause I’ve now begun my own desperate pledge to get my hands on him. But then again I have to admit JLo did get her paws on Casper Smart first so I may just like you have to wait in the back of the line until JLo is done with him. But really I think that isn’t any time soon…
So who exactly is ‘Casper I’m just licking the wet juices clean Smart’ anyway? Well apparently he’s one of JLo’s dancers and that bixch has taken a real liking to this hawt bixch.
dlisted: JLo has been dragging Casper Smart all over the place from Buenos Aires to San Francisco ever since they started boning on each other a couple of weeks ago. A source says that the relationship is labeled as “very casual” and JLo is trying to keep it that way. At 5’8″ and 160 pounds, Casper is a pocket hottie and moved his tiny little legs while dancing in an episode of Glee and in the direct-to-the-discount-bin masterpiece Honey 2. Casper joined JLo’s harem of dancers earlier this year.
So in other words she picks him up his ankles and fxcks him, which I have to admit has got me smiling for all things fair in male/female relationships. That of course hasn’t stopped me from drafting the first of many love letters to Casper.
Dear Casper,
When I look deep into your brown eyes I imagine losing myself in your peen and dangling myself like a hot tossed salad desperate for an extra dash of mayonnaise (did I just say that?) from your loins to then only be held in your arms where I will whimper like a lost child re united with their bib, nuzzling my pain closer and closer to the apex of your soul until even you remiss and violently groan in my clutch.
Casper- you are a hawt bixch and one day even I will come to understand the joy you give the world…
eternally yours,
Scallywag.
ps- until then keep doing those 40 000 sit ups…
JLO IS A COMPLETE WHORE BITCH