Offender number 3- the Hipster quotient is over. We despise you! Yes that means you Paul Sevigny(king of hipsters so I was told once) and Kari Ferrell (queen of ex criminal and hipster bloggers).
Yes, kids- it’s official- I’m here to tell you. Being ironical while in actuality you are not being ironical but a mindless follower of the same hipster uniform is out. We can no longer stand watching you all parade up and down Bedford ave ( and while we are at it- Morgan Ave) in your skinny stove pipe jeans (yes I know, there’s no way in hell I could ever fit in any to begin with- blah!) , your Birkenstock sandals, eyeliners out to your ears and those redundant tattoos (wouldn’t it be cool if for once we didn’t bump into a 16 year old who doesn’t already have tattoos but displays their creativity through their choice of actions and thoughts as opposed to obvious trite rallying points) have all got to go.
If you want to be ironical, actually do something that is ironical – like make films or write books that question the current cultural dialectics or at least inspire commentary and thought, as opposed to sucking up the current cultural milieu which states that you have to look camera whore friendly or horde glamorous.
Looking like you all came from the same Salvation army store (for those of you desperate to copy the look- run to North 7 and Bedford, Brooklyn) is getting on our nerves and having us wonder instead of being surrounded by clever eccentric individuals, all I am really surrounded by when I have my morning brioche and latte (in my dapper European quilts and ironic skate board shorts thank you) is that I am being surrounded by mindless souls who have confused mindlessness and apathy for irony and cutting edge. You haven’t and I am offended. Go back to Wisconsin now. Move back to the end of the caffe and prepare to receive 100 on the spot lashes now. Heathen! Interns start whipping!!
oh wow……a bit of Anna Wintour poo-naa-nee-naa-nee….. you know what i’m talking about