Some things are stranger than fiction or perhaps a take on fiction. You be the judge.
NY Mag: Last week a woman wearing a cat mask burglarized a high-end shoe store in Astor Place. In addition to the makings of a hilarious, real wanted poster, this story also obviously had the makings of a pun-drenched Post story. Witness:
A serial stickup artist with a penchant for disguises — including a cat mask — has sunk her claws into shoe and beauty stores in Manhattan and Queens … According to the source, the lithe 5-foot-6, 115 pound thief, described in a wanted poster as possibly Middle Eastern, strode into the store at around 1:30 p.m. She prowled for about 45 minutes before donning her disguise and pouncing on a sales clerk … She got her paws scampered off, the source said.
One has to appreciate the sense of humor and joie de vive this new bandit has. One has to wonder if cat woman has started a new trend or fulfilling a kind of wicked fantasy? Either way we’re certainly going to enjoy her getting to play her fantastical game. Of course in the event you happen to get stuck up by the catwoman herself, at least you can say the missing $86 or whatever was a form of levy for an off off broadway performance courtesy in your own jewelry or department store.
For her next burglary, however, the woman doffed her cat mask and put on … a burka. How to punnify that, Post? “According to the source, she strode into The Body Shop on Austin Street and Continental Avenue in Queens at 12:50 p.m. and barked out her order to hand over some cash.”
We only hope that customers applauded her on her way out…