Home Scandal and Gossip Kate Gosselin ditches her kids for a tanning salon.

Kate Gosselin ditches her kids for a tanning salon.

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Urban catastrophes in the heartland.

The world is getting ready to throw up this weekend with the realization that media whore and public nuisance Kate Gosselin has ditched her kids in favor for a long winding down sojourn at the salon. Reports a deeply offended US Mag:

Kate Gosselin spent her first full day back in Pennsylvania after getting the boot from Dancing With the Stars… at the tanning salon!

Leaving her eight children behind at their $1.1 million home with their father Jon, she hit up her fave local fake bake joint and also made time for a pedicure.

As you can imagine the whole of Pennsylvania must be beside themselves and in all likelihood are vigorously shaking their heads and looking for the ingrate with their pitching forks. Continues US mag, the be all and the end all of the heartland’s moral value system:

Kate, 35, hasn’t spent much time with her kids since her run on DWTS wrapped up.

After catching up with them for 20 minutes on Thursday, she hopped into a limousine with her bodyguard Steve Neild, with whom she has denied having an affair, to drive to New York City to tape an apperance on Live with Regis and Kelly.

One day when the kids all grow up they will have all have fangs and hunched backs and when US mag turns up to take pictures of them, we will all know it was Kate’s fault.

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