Did poochie get eaten up by big bad coyote or did she just run away?
From California: Where only things like this happen- celebrity dogs go missing and the world goes onto hysterics. This story is too stupid and ridiculous for us not to notice- but notice we did. Media whore (why are they all media whores?) Ashlee Simpson has been making a big scene about some dog of hers that’s gone missing. Apparently eaten up by hungry wolves. How dare they? Didn’t they know poochie(Daisy) was a celebrity media whore’s little girl? That said we’ve decided to run our own missing celebrity/media whore ad. We think poochie just might come back…read below.
Celebrity Media Whore will offer blow job and signed autograph in return for my missing pooch- Ditzy.
Hi my name is Ashlly Simpthon. Excuthe me spelling mistakes but I am brokens up now that my pooch –Daithy- has gone missing. I am very stupid, I mean sad that Ditzy has gone but maybe if you kind of see her I’d like her back ‘cause she makes me smile, laugh and keep the appaparazzi off my ass (which I have been told is very cute…giggle).
I have tried everything, Larry King, facebook, twitter , and even looking in my forty three acre back yard and under my bed butt nada (that’s Mexikan for nothing).
Please if you know where DITZY is please let me know. I miss her every much and I can’t wait to kiss her again.
If you find her – please only feed her fillet mignon and bottled water. Also she might bite you but pleez don’t take that personally since she’s just my dog and not yours.
Anyway if you fond her pleez call my publicist and I will drop off and reward you. Yummy reward coming up!
Bye for neow and please look out for my new single it;’s called – “Ditzy.”
