A night out with Bergdorf Goodman. Bonne travaillez Joseph Scheer.

SCV: Scallywag. Tell me Mr. Scheer is there anyone famous here tonight. Really let’s cut to the chase.

JS: You mean Hollywood types?

SCV: If inclined. No we really don’t care about Hollywood.

JS: In that case Barbara London (Associate Curator of Media at MOMA), Karen Helmerson (whose name nearly  escaped me, bloody gin I say-Director of NY State Council’s Electronic Media and Film Program ) Peer Bode (Video artist), Delano Greenidge (publisher and provocateur extradonaire), Dakota Jackson (eminent American furniture designer and artist himself) and editor in chief of Cosmopolitan magazine- Kate White (editor’s note- who had the temerity to try to offer Scallywag’s lovely intern- Rebecca a job. As if she would ever leave Scallywag…duh)

SCV: What about Tom Cruise?

JS: I’m afraid he wasn’t invited.

SCV: Was that because of  personal reasons?

JS: No, but he really is a bit short for me.

SCV: For all of us I should think…Tell us about the venue. After all this is Bergdorf Goodmans.

JS: I was seduced by the novelty of it. I think it’s marvelous, and fun. Anyway they approached me, and I just had to agree.

SCV: Well, I’m still hopeful they will approach me one day too. Tell us, are artists born or made?

JS: Both.

SCV: Are you being diplomatic? Tell me would you come to Bergdorf Goodamns to buy stockings?

JS: Would you?

SCV: If inclined.

Silliness aside we proceeded to regard the lovely work of Mr.Scheer, who in essence had come to capture God’s work. We on the other hand had come to capture a great show which we did, a few drinks (which we obviously did) and a pair of stockings…which we didn’t. Not to fear, we’ll be back here soon, even if they don’t have Tom Cruise drop by…